I’m a person who likes my ducks in a row. I am a planner, an organizer, and very much a worrier. I try to do the right things. I am responsible. I am careful in what I say and do. I like to be in control of my life. Usually I am. Then something happens that reminds me that it is all just an illusion. Something beyond my control. I know that I am not the only one experiencing this. Somehow that is not comforting.
Like many people in this country, I am losing my job. I found out that my position is being terminated in a little over a month. While I knew I could have my hours cut, I was not expecting this. There are not many jobs out there right now and I’m not so young anymore. We need my income. Our youngest daughter is unemployed in New York City and we have been helping her, or should I say mostly supporting her. She needs help for anxiety and depression. She’s in a difficult point in her life and I’m trying to be supportive. Now our cat is sick again. Hundreds of dollars later, she is still not better—we are giving her antibiotics, fluids and sticking food down her. I’m also dealing with some medical issues of my own, including a blood test result that the doctor says she’ll be watching—another weight hanging over me. I have no control over any of it.
I guess this is where faith comes in. I’m working on that. . .
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