Take Time to Play

I like to break up my work day by eating my lunch away from my desk (unlike my coworkers). This is also my opportunity to read for about a half an hour, something I really look forward to. Recently, I finished a book called BREAKFAST EPIPHANIES by David Anderson. The author is a pastor and each chapter is a short inspirational story. Several of his stories really struck me.

David Anderson attended the funeral of a man who was a mentor to him, a fellow pastor. One of the attendees shared a story about how she had arrived at church early one Sunday and found the pastor (a man in his sixties) on a swing in the church playground, swinging away and not the least bit embarrassed about it. After the funeral the author visited the nearest playground and followed his mentor's lead. He realized that there was a message there for him. In another chapter he discusses sabbaticals; he believes that everyone needs one. We should not work all the time.

These stories caught my attention because I have realized lately that my life is way too serious. I work about 35 hours a week. I volunteer at my own church. My yard is an acre so there are always things to do. There is laundry. Plants to water. A house to clean. Mail piles up. E-mails need to be read and answered. I go to bed and it starts all over again.

We all need to play. I've tried do more fun things lately. We went for a long bike ride on Memorial Day. Last weekend we went to a Greek food festival and to a local event called Art & Roses. We went to see the movie "Up". The stormy weather this weekend has put a damper on outdoor activities but I'll find something tomorrow. I've got to work at playing!

Thinking of Nancy

This past week the Living the Questions group at our church finished a study on the Bible and homosexuality. It had been 20 years since we last did a study on this issue. Several people in the group have family members who are gay or lesbian and a number of us have gay friends. After our first meeting, one of the group members brought a friend who belongs to another church but often attends one of our women's groups. Halfway through our session this friend, I'll call her Nancy, felt comfortable enough with us to share that she is a lesbian. She told us that she was approached by some fellow church members about becoming a deacon in their church. She felt she had to turn this down because her church does not allow homosexuals to be deacons. Nancy said that she hadn't done anything but that she is not considered good enough simply because of who she is. This is very painful for her since she feels called to serve and would very much like to serve her church. Over the weeks, this painful subject came up over and over. Nancy's input gave our discussions a whole new perspective and we appreciated her candor. She related a meeting with a GLBT group (gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender) where a woman exclaimed with tears of joy, "God loves me!" Nancy realized that this was the first time in this woman's 50+ years of life that she had felt this way. How sad. Perhaps those of us who profess to be followers of Jesus need to work a bit harder at emulating his love rather than trying to judge our fellow human beings.

If the Shoe Fits. . .

I am not a shoe person. I do have members of my family who could be described this way, including my oldest daughter. On her Christmas list was a sparkly pair of green shoes that could be purchased online. I bought them for her. They are a lot of fun and look great on her. However, that is not me.

My approach to shoes is to buy what I need and that’s it. I will keep shoes for years. In fact, I own shoes and boots that are older than my daughters. That doesn’t mean that I don’t care how they look. I appreciate a stylish pair of shoes—I just don’t get terribly excited about them. Now, as I’m getting older, I appreciate a well fitting pair of shoes, especially ones with good arch supports. Comfort is everything. Pretty shoes are no good if they hurt your feet.

It seems that I have been forced to focus on shoes these past couple of months. My shoes all seem to be dying at once. The dances we’re learning in my tap class seem to be getting faster and faster and my shoes were inadequate. I had looked around at the few dance shops in town about a year ago but didn’t find anything suitable. The steps requiring us to go up on our heels hurt my feet. However, when I realized that something was beginning to poke into the ball of my foot, that was it. I bought new tap shoes.

Next was the hiking boots. I bought my good old leather hiking boots at REI in Berkeley over 25 years ago. Good quality boots. The only problem was that they were never fully broken in, even after all those years of use. Still hard as a rock, instead of the boot giving, my foot did. If I didn’t get a blister, I would at least have red spots on my feet. After two summers of saying that I was never wearing those boots again, I finally did something about it. Bob was looking at sandals at REI and suggested that I try on boots. It took me a week to decide but after climbing on their little rock with the handrail to truly try them out, I selected a great pair of boots made with synthetic materials. Now, if those boots will last 25 years, I’ll be set!

Last night I went square dancing with shoes that are probably 30 years old. Something was beginning to poke through the heel, so I couldn’t really put my entire weight on it. Old, white, dirty square dance shoes. What was I thinking? Why was I still wearing them? Today, I found the little square dance shop that is located in someone’s home (the only place available in Boise) and I bought a pair of black dance shoes. They were even on sale!

I’m not done yet. I have been trying to replace the brown shoes I wear to work. They are to the point where I hesitate to wear them when it rains. Still looking. However, I have found some great casual shoes on sale during my search. Who knows? I might actually begin to enjoy shoe shopping. But probably not.

Happy Birthday Barbie!

Today is Barbie's 50th birthday so I want to celebrate her special day. After all, I grew up with Barbie. I didn't have the very first Barbie with the ponytail. My sister and I had the Barbies with the bubble hairdo. Hers was blonde and mine was brunette (apparently to match our own haircolors). My sister's wore the well known black and white striped bathing suit; I think my doll's was red and white. I had the first Ken doll, the one with the blonde fuzzy hair that rubbed off after a period of time. My sister had a Midge and Allan. We both had Skipper plus I had Scooter and Ricky. We didn't have multiple Barbies, a concept that my daughters find hard to understand. The idea was to buy outfits and accessories for your doll. Actually, I only owned a few official Barbie outfits for all of my dolls. However, one Christmas my grandmother gave my sister and me each an entire collection of Barbie-size clothes, handmade by someone she knew. We were in heaven. I saved my dolls for my daughters but they had a hard time competing with the new Barbies. There were so many different versions, I couldn't keep track. Instead of buying outfits, they just got a new doll for each theme. Once our girls could sleep in bunkbeds together, we turned the other bedroom into a playroom. The large Barbie dollhouse, made by my father for me and my sister many years ago, was moved into that room. The girls' Barbie dolls led very busy lives, judging by the look of the room; very often we couldn't find the floor. Gradually, Barbie and friends lost out to other interests and they now reside in boxes. I haven't quite forgotten my love for Barbie. Every Christmas I buy the latest Hallmark Barbie ornament for my Christmas tree and for a little while I am that little girl again.

Empty Nest Again

Early on Sunday our nest emptied once again. We drove our youngest daughter to the airport for her trip back to Boston. From there we headed out in the dark towards Sun Valley. We have had an inversion in Boise and hadn't seen the sun in a while so as we moved up through the muck into the sun, it was glorious. Brilliant blue sky and sparkling snow. We enjoyed an afternoon of cross country skiing with our friends, recovered at their condo, then headed out for pizza.

Through the afternoon and into the evening, I periodically got phone calls from Erin as she dealt with a cancelled flight, rebooked, and waited and waited. She called me once she reached the Boston airport but forgot to call when she reached her room. Worried, I called her and found she was back safely. Sigh.

This time saying goodbye to her was different. In the past I always knew that I would see her again at the next break. This time we don't know where she'll be next summer because she hopes to get an internship. Returning home to Boise makes no sense because there are no jobs here for her. I don't know when I'll see her again. It made the goodbye more difficult. The short trip to Sun Valley was a wonderful break; I realized that it is time for us to live our own lives.

The Dawn of Hope

I really couldn't let today go by without comment. The eyes of the entire world were on Washington D.C today. The number of people around the Capitol mall was incredible. I had to work today so all I could do was attempt to follow the inauguration via the internet feed on my computer. The daughter of a friend was there in the crowd so I was able to look at her photos on Facebook. What a historic event! People of multiple races, ages, and backgrounds were there. So much hope is being placed on one man. No mortal could possibly live up to the expectations. Our country has overwhelming problems; the economy seems to be collapsing. I too hope that Barack Obama can begin to turn things around. I hope people give him a chance. Although lacking in experience, he's a brilliant man with the power to inspire. I hope he's up to this tremendous challenge. I will be praying for him and our country. I will dare to hope.

I'm Being Read!

Today I received an e-mail from someone on my Christmas card list. This is someone with whom I exchange Christmas cards/letters every year but we haven't seen each other in years. She had to tell me that she had finally read my blog--all of it. Wow. Somehow I'm always surprised when somebody tells me that they've read my blog, even when it's one of my daughters. As I write my blog I have to remind myself that someone might actually read it; it's such a lonely exercise. Now, I suppose that if I always got comments like my daughter does on her livejournal blog, that would be a different matter. So, to whomever may be reading this, I'll try to make it worthwhile.

Holiday Reflections

I'm not really sure that I'm ready for the holidays to be over, for a number of reasons. The lights and decorations are so cheerful. I really love the way Christmas lights reflect off the snow. . . or through the snow. When the lights disappear, we are just left with the cold of January. The best part of the holiday season is time spent with family. It becomes even more important now that I'm an empty nester. Bob and I have no family in the state of Idaho, just each other.

On November 19, Bob flew to Florida to stay with his mom then drive her up to North Carolina. She had a stroke in April and is unable to travel alone. I flew to Raleigh on Nov. 21. It was an uneventful, fairly quick trip. Laura and Ian picked me up at the airport. (Her hair was streaked with turquoise this time - at least she warned me.) Laura and I got up early the next morning so she could go to the barn and ride Rocket. It was freezing out, especially for Raleigh! I watched Laura ride, took photos, and tried to keep warm. Her young instructor was there, too, and I got to see her jump. This is something Laura really loves, so I'm glad she found a place to ride. That evening the two of us went to see the new movie "Twilight". It was true to the book (which Laura had asked me to read) and very entertaining. On Sunday Laura and I attended her church (Ian slept in). Afterwards, we went out to lunch with the young adult group, a nice bunch of people. Laura and Ian both had to work on Monday so I tagged along with Laura - sort of a "take your mom to work day". I was a bit surprised that her boss was so willing to have me there. Most of the time I sat next to her at her computer and watched her work. I was even recruited to help test a game for a short time, a group test. That was fun although I'm not a video game player and had no idea how to use the controls. Laura, her boss, a female friend from the art department (one of the few other women) and I went to lunch. All in all, an interesting day. It was a nice few days, good mother/daughter time which I treasured because it happens so seldom anymore. Shortly after we returned to their home, Bob and his mom arrived.

Laura picked up her sister, Erin, at the airport on Wednesday afternoon. Finally we were all together. Thanksgiving was a whirlwind of activity with food preparation and figuring out how to seat 10 people in their little dining area. This was a huge change for me. It was the first time in 20 years that I did not have to make Thanksgiving dinner. Of course, I helped and offered advice, but this was Laura's show. She was hosting her first holiday meal in their own home, a big deal. She was nervous, but it came off well. Her childhood friend, Liz, who is attending graduate school at NC State was present, too, and was a great help. They had two small turkeys and the two of them worked on them together, Laura learning from Liz who had done it before. They had fun working together. Laura's inlaws, and Bob's brother, George, also came to dinner. It was a special time with everyone together.

We were able to stay until Monday when Erin and I flew off in our own directions while Bob and his mother headed back to Florida. It was hard to see my mother-in-law moving so slowly and struggling in frustration to do what she used to do easily. However, I was pleased to see her determination and progress, amazing for someone 85 years old. It was hard to say goodbye to her since I don't know when I'll get to see her again.

Erin arrived in Boise on December 18 for her Christmas break then Laura and Ian followed 2 days later. The week went so quickly! Although they arrived late on Saturday (actually early on Sunday), and we all got to bed late, everybody was up bright and early for our special church service. The choir, with Bob as a bass, sang a cantata which was lovely. I contributed to the service by assisting with the reading for the lighting of the Advent candles (including an angel costume and thank goodness no photos were taken). On Tuesday night we all went to the Idaho Botanical Garden's "Winter Garden a Glow". We had attended this event years ago but this was a totally different experience. The lights were plentiful and beautiful plus we were able to warm ourselves by the small warming barrels and sip hot chocolate. My camera didn't like the cold temperature but I was able to get some great photos. Afterwards, we enjoyed a late dinner at Applebee's.

I had to work on Christmas Eve day but that evening we ordered our traditional Chinese takeout. We decided to attended the late service at church. It had begun to snow earlier in the evening so the attendance was low. It was a nice, quiet, reflective service, and the drive back in the snow was lovely, although a bit wet. Christmas Day was spent at home, opening gifts, eating, and just enjoying each others' company. We did go out later in the evening to look at Christmas lights, our last chance.

On Friday afternoon we rented snowshoes from REI and headed up to Bogus Basin. Ian had never been on snowshoes before so he was really excited. We nixed Bob's idea of walking along the XC ski trails and headed off on snowshoe trails instead, which included very steep ups and downs. The snow was fresh powder, just wonderful, and decorated the trees surrounding us. We spent about 2 hours out, and got back just before dark, and just when we were getting a bit tired. It was a good family activity and lots of fun.

Laura and Ian left early the next morning. It was hard to say goodbye this time since we don't know when we'll see them again. Laura said they'll come out next Thanksgiving but that's so far off. I sure hope we see them before that. It's hard to have them so far away. Thank goodness for e-mails, cell phones, and instant messaging. Erin will be here until January 18 so we aren't back to being empty nesters again yet.